He Parental Alienation Syndrome (SAP) Consists of that child behavioral alteration, derived from the process of conjugal rupture, especially if it is highly conflictive. In it, children criticize, reject, ignore or annul one parent unjustifiably and / or exaggerated.
The SAP emerges in a context where the increase in separation and divorce couple has exploded.
The traditional family model to which we are accustomed, as it is composed of two people who have married and have had children, has been modified throughout history, both in its structure and in the intra-family interactions that are Within.
When a couple with children decides to end their relationship, they do so taking into account both legal and emotional aspects. However, the manner of carrying said separation may be very different.
We meet with those families who are aware that it no longer makes sense to remain united, because they do not get along, they have different ideas that lead them to have different opinions, or they are not in love. Then, they decide to end their relationship and do so in a responsible and reasonable manner, maintaining a cordial relationship for the maintenance of family harmony.
However, on the other hand, in most cases, the separation is usually conflictive, assuming important changes in the child's life who are immersed in the problems of adults, taking sides in the conflict and becoming part of The clashes between the two, supporting one side and rejecting another.
There are other positions, which advocate a more positive view of the process of separation or divorce. They understand it not as a break, but as a restructuring of the family.
Historical aspects
The parental alienation syndrome has not been recognized as a"disorder", however this does not mean that it does not exist.
It was first described by Wallerstein and Kelly, and they called it"unholy alliance"(unholy alliance). These authors studied divorce and its repercussions exhaustively.
It was in the mid-1980s when Richard A. Gardner Coins the name with which it is known today. Gardner defined the SAP as a"disorder that arises mainly in the context of disputes for custody of children.
The first manifestation is a campaign of defamation against one of the parents, by the child, who has no justification. The son is concerned to see one of the parents as"the good", who is loved and idealized and another as the"bad", who is verbally hated and defamed.
SAP includes other subconscious and unconscious factors (defenses, systematic projections...), through which the alienating parent contributes to alienation.
Johnston and Campbell, on the other hand, use the concept of alienation to refer to the strong preferences of the children towards one of the progenitors.
Parental alienation has been supported by some authors and discredited by others.
Factors involved in the onset of parental alienation syndrome
Authors like Cartwright in 1993, studied those factors that they thought could be predisposing to the appearance of SAP.
They concluded that SAP may appear due to the existence of possible disagreements between parents in custody as well as in economic aspects.
In addition, false allegations of sexual abuse as alienation strategies as well as manipulation of the child's time may also be underpinned. Tending to use this one in order to prevent contaminated contact with the alienated parent.
In turn, it has been seen that aspects related to the judicial aspects influence decision-making in this regard as they can unintentionally foster the attitude of the alienating parent.
In addition, intense levels of alienation can mental disorders In the children.
Characteristics of the parental alienation syndrome
Gardner, principal investigator of the SAP, proposes the presence of the following symptoms:
- Emergence of a Denigration campaign Which is initiated by the alienating parent and subsequently continued by the child. For example: A mother who tells her son every time she has to reunite with her father, who in fact does not buy what she asks because it actually goes from him.
- Use of light, absurd and cold reasons To disqualify the alienated parent. For example: a child who complains because his father does not let him stay at night watching his favorite show. Or that his father is stupid because he does not let him play the play station.
- Generalization of rejection towards the parent Alienated, due to the beliefs and learning that has been absorbing of the situation and due to the influence that has exerted on him the alienated progenitor.
- He Child adopts the role of independent thinker , That is, it assumes disqualifications for the alienated parent as well as denying the influence of others in their beliefs.
- Absence of fault Towards the alienating progenitor by the behaviors, attitudes and feelings that expresses towards him.
- Blind and absolute support of the child towards the parent aligner , And absence of the questioning of the validity of his judgments towards the rejected father.
- Extension of rejection towards the alienated parent To the whole context around him (friends, relatives of the family).
Other authors such as Waldron and Joanis in 1996 have suggested the presence of other indicators such as the following:
- They are children for whom everything seems to have an importance of life and death.
- They show a high degree of sentimental restraint.
- They present a high degree of contradictions between the statements of the child and the narration of historical facts.
- In addition they have the inappropriate and unnecessary information that the child has on the causes of the parents' rupture and the legal process.
Parental Alienation Syndrome Classification
Gardnet proposed in 1998 the existence of three types of parental alienation, namely light, moderate and severe.
Light Parental Alienation Syndrome
There is a superficial alienation, and the children usually cooperate, with which they go to the visits with the parents, presenting a normal behavior. However, they are sometimes displeased. The bond with the"alienating"parent is strong and healthy, and with the"alienated"parent it is strong, healthy, or minimally pathological.
With respect to the 8 symptomatic characteristics I mentioned earlier are not always present.
Moderate Parental Alienation Syndrome
In this case the alienation is more important. Children present to the alienating parent a more negative attitude, as well as being irresponsible. The alienated parent is described as a"bad"person, and the alienator is"good." In addition, children say they do not feel influenced and show an oppositional attitude. During the visits they present an antagonistic and provocative behavior.
They meet the 8 diagnostic characteristics, although it occurs to a less degree than in the severe SAP. With respect to the previous one, the phenomenon of the"independent thinker"I mentioned earlier, the reflexive support to the aligning parent and extension of the rejection to the social network of the alienated parent appear.
Parental Alienation Syndrome severe
In this case, the SAP degree is extreme. Children are hostile and may even come to physical violence. Visits are practically impossible, and if given the behavior developed is destructive and continually provocative. The father-alien-parent bond is completely pathological, and sometimes even touches the paranoid.
The 8 symptoms are fulfilled, reaching a high severity.
Parental alienation course
Authors such as Bone and Walsh suggest the existence of a progressive course in SAP.
First, there is the blockade motivated by the alienating parent, the access and contact between the child and the alienated parent. As underlying reasons we can find the supposed protection towards the child by the altered, pathological and abusive behaviors of the aligned one.
Second, false or unfounded allegations of abuse against a parent arise. Usually they are usually accusations of sexual abuse because they are the ones that are more difficult to demonstrate.
Third, there is a gradual deterioration in the child's relationship with the alienated parent. This contrasts with the previous relationship between the two.
Finally, there is the manifestation of intense fear of the child towards the alienated parent, as well as the rejection of their contact.
People involved in s Parental alienation syndrome
The parental alienation syndrome involves the alienating parent, the alienated parent and the victim of the alienation.
From the moment in which a separation or divorce occurs and one of the parents is in charge of custody of the child, the process of alienation begins.
The alienating parent
Underlying the motivation of the aligning parent to alienate the offspring of the other parent are precipitating situations such as the following:
- Incapacity in the alienator to accept The break of the couple And attempts to maintain the relationship, even through conflict.
- Desires for revenge, control, self-protection and overprotection of the child, avoidance of pain, as well as feelings of guilt , Fear of losing children or losing the parent parental role.
- Existence of jealousy Towards the alienated parent and desires to obtain advantages in the decisions regarding the distribution of economic goods or pensions.
- Existence of a pathological picture.
- Existence of a previous personal history of abandonment of their parents, alignment, physical abuse Or sexual and loss of identity.
The alienated parent
With respect to the alienated progenitor is affected that this usually has for its children an authoritarian personality, with a marked rigid and distant educational style. This contrasts with the permissiveness and indulgence of the alienating parent.
In addition, they are usually people with deficits in their parental skills, low sensitivity to the needs of the child, history of difficulties with their own family of origin and fears of the relationship with their children. They also have a previous life history in which they have assumed the role of victim.
They are usually more concerned with the manipulation of the other parent than how they are contributing to the problem. For example, Johnston and Rosebay argue that this contribution may be based on a reactive and persecutory hostile character to the child in the form of telephone calls, letters or unforeseen presences in their activities.
Victims of alienation
Children who are involved in these conflictive situations often experience a sense of loss due to the rupture between their parents, and to this feeling and the vision of one of the parents as weak and strong, they develop a distorted view of the situation.
At the beginning of the rupture, when they feel abandoned, they develop fantasies and try to reconcile their parents. Then they begin to look anxious in the moments that precede the visits to the parents. This exchange is rather disturbing.
Because they are aware of the high tension of parents, children try to attract their attention, whether in the form of disruptive behavior, getting angry, complaining...
Before the fear that they feel towards the affective rejection try to maintain the esteem that they feel for them. In some cases, they maintain a neutral position and avoid reinforcing parents' conflicts, expressing the desire to remain the same time with both parents.
Children strive to protect the self-esteem Of their parents to ensure they are not emotionally abandoned by them.
They are people who suffer from a sense of emotional shock, intense fear and deep confusion. In addition, they have negative consequences at the psycho-emotional and behavioral levels.
They often experience feelings of abandonment and guilt, they feel rejection towards the alienated parent, as well as impotence to be in that situation. They are defenseless, insecure.
They are often subject to Anxiety states Y depression And present regressive, disruptive behaviors and school problems.
Psychological intervention
In the syndrome of parental alienation, only one therapist should participate in the intervention. In addition, it is advisable to inform from the beginning that the confidentiality in the sessions will be altered, this way they will avoid secrets that can affect the child, victim of the alienator syndrome. The psychologist will report on the existence of sanctions for non-compliance or obstruction of treatment.
Both the alienating parent and the child will receive treatment. For its part, the alienated parent must be informed of what the syndrome of parental alienation is.
Lastly, family mediation will be used to involve all members of the family in order to ensure that the parties to a conflict reach equitable, just, stable and long-term agreements for the resolution of problems already initiated, or Avoidance of these.
conclusion
When starting a separation or divorce and there are children involved, it is important to be aware of what this process may mean for them.
It is convenient to think about the implications that this situation can have on them and how they can influence their personal (personality, feelings, thoughts, inferences) and social (relationship with their peers, relationship with parents, relationships).
Bibliography
- Bolaños, I. (2000). Descriptive study of the Parental Alienation Syndrome. Design and implementation of a family mediation pilot program. Autonomous University of Barcelona.
- Cartié, M., Casany, R., Domínguez, R., Gamero, M., García, C., González, M. and Pastor, C. (2005). Descriptive analysis of the characteristics associated with the syndrome of parental alienation (SAP). Clinical, Legal and Forensic Psychopathology, vol. 5, p. 5-29.
- Bone M, Walsh M: Parental Alienation Syndrome: How
To detect it and what to do about it. The Florida Bar Journal 1999; 73: 44-8. - Gardner R: Does DSM IV have equivalents for the parental alienation syndrome (PAS) diagnosis? Am I Fam Ther 2003; 31: 1-21.