What is Helplessness Learned and How to Avoid It?

The Learned helplessness , Also called learned helplessness, is a style of passive behavior, which is due to the belief that our actions do not Will produce no change in the current or future situation.

The feeling that these people have is that they do not have the power or control to change what they do not like, it causes them discomfort or it seems to them unfair.

Let us begin by talking about us, the human beings, who, faced with a conflictive, problematic or unjust situation, we have two alternatives of performance:

• Intervene to try to change it.
• Staying passive before her.

Now think about a conflict or problem that you have had recently. Think about how you acted. Did you tackle the problem or did you decide that the best thing was do nothing?

What is behind these two different attitudes? Why some people do not act before the problems and others do?

After the first attitude, to intervene in the situation with the aim of changing it, are people who believe in their own abilities and in the Possibility of changing things through their actions. They trust in themselves.

After the second attitude, to remain passive before the situation, are people affected by the defenselessness learned.

Characteristics of learned helplessness

For you to understand better, I present several examples of situations in which it is usually given the defenselessness learned:

• Children who suffer from bullying, who endure this type of abuse throughout their school stage.
• Students who tolerate disrespect of their teachers.
• Battered women, who do not denounce or react to the mistreatment they suffer.
• Employees who endure situations of abuse of power at work.
• Unemployed people who are not looking for work.
• Citizens who do not vote do not express or oppose what their political leaders impose.
• People who do not help humanitarian causes because they believe that however much they do, nothing is going to change.
• Etc.

The defenselessness learned does not occur only in the people who participate in the situations I have just described, but also occurs in all those People who passively observe what happens without doing anything about it.

In all cases there is something in common, the belief that they can not change their current situation or the current situation of their society, resulting in a Expression of our desires or our rights.

Helplessness learned is aggravated when actions, such as mistreatment, do not follow a logical order that allows the person to prepare for it Which will happen, but occur without notice and without a justified cause.

Theory of defenselessness learned

The theory of learned helplessness emerged in the 1970s from the hand of Martin Seligman , A prestigious American psychologist.

Seligman performed an experiment that provided electric shocks to caged dogs as they tried to leave. Dogs could not Do nothing to escape such downloads.

The result was that, after several discharges, the animals stopped trying to escape, even when the door was open and there was no Risk of more discharges.

As we can see, these dogs had acquired defenselessness learned quite quickly, acquiring an inactive and passive attitude before such situation.

The animals had learned that, whatever they did, the result would always be the same and, therefore, they could not escape from the cages.

How does the defenselessness learned in people arise?

The defenselessness learned, as its name indicates, is learned. This learning can be done in many different ways, some of them are:

• By living in an excessively controlled environment, ie children whose parents control everything that happens around them and do not let the child Experiment with your environment and learn the consequences of your actions.
• Through the messages we have received in childhood. If when we are little we say: you can not, do not try, let me you do not You know... the result is adults with a lack of self-esteem and learned defenselessness.
• Through a series of continued failures. Imagine that you try something over and over and you always get the same failed result. At the end You give up, you give up, like the dogs of Seligman's experiment.
• For the absence of a logical order in the behaviors. For example, abusers who get into a child unpredictably and without the victim Has done nothing previously. In this way, the affected subject can not prepare himself for what is going to happen and the defenselessness learned is aggravated.

The fact that a person like you has an attitude of control and mastery or a defenseless attitude learned is mainly due to the Children's experiences.

Childhood is the most important stage in the life of a person, since in these years it is where the personality structure is forged to be maintained Throughout his life with enough stability.

Although childhood is the key stage in learning processes, learned helplessness can also be acquired in adulthood.

Consequences of learned helplessness

The learned helplessness goes hand in hand with a series of serious consequences that affect all areas of life (personal, family, social, labor…).

If you are a person who has learned defenselessness, surely:

• Have a great feeling of impotence.
• You feel that you have no control over what happens to you or happens around you.
• You feel that your efforts are useless, that no matter what you do because nothing will change the course of events.
• Do not correctly identify the causality of the facts.
• Do not react or act, have a Passive attitude .
• Do not feel responsibility for anything.
• Do not be motivated.
• Do not take initiative.
• Etc.

As a result of all the consequences we have just described, the person manifests a series of feelings such as sadness, insecurity , fear…

Studies have shown that learned helplessness can influence disease development, although the relationship between helplessness Learned and disease is complex because it involves innumerable variables.

In studies of rats, it has been shown that those who suffered from learned helplessness were more likely to develop ulcers than not.

What has been shown is that learned helplessness is intimately related to depression.

The person acquires defenselessness learned after successive failures, loses the sense of control before what happens to him and ends up behaving in a way Passive and inactive, forging a depression.

How to avoid helplessness learned in 10 steps

Helplessness learned is a behavior that we have learned through lived experiences, therefore, we can unlearn it or acquire another Type of behavior that is healthier and incompatible with defenselessness.

Here are 10 easy steps to avoid it:

1. Identify in which areas of your life you manifest defenselessness learned

At work, at school, with your family, with your partner, with friends...

This is the first step and may at first cost you, since you have been behaving this way for a long time. Do not worry about it, it's Totally normal.

To make this identification easier, you can ask the following questions for each area of ​​your life:

• Do I express my wishes?
• Defend my rights?
• Would I like to act differently?
• Why do not I act differently?
• Would I like to get different results?
• Would I like the relationship to be different?
• Do I have control over this situation?

These questions will help you become aware of how you behave in each situation and, most importantly, if you are satisfied with that behavior Or you would like to change it.

2. Look for outside help

Asking for help is not a sign of weakness, but of strength. The people who ask for help are the Mature enough To understand that the Help from others is a major boost to get out of the current situation.

Such help is also very useful so that the others from outside help you to identify in which situations you behave with defenselessness learned and in which not.

With the help of your loved ones or the right professionals, the change will be simpler and less expensive.

3. Perform exercises or activities that give you back the feeling of control

The activities or exercises to be performed can be very varied, you must choose them according to your tastes and preferences.

Start with simple activities or small easy-to-reach daily goals that you feel you have control of, such as: Soup of letters, make simple mathematical problems, read small texts...

4. Do self-esteem exercises

Generally people with learned helplessness have a low self-esteem, so If you work on self-esteem , The beneficial effects that You will have repercussions in the reduction of your defenselessness.

As in the previous point, you must choose the Self-esteem exercises With which you feel more comfortable.

5. Rebuke yourself for your actions

People who suffer from learned helplessness tend to have a lack of positive reinforcement, both from external persons and from self towards the
activities carried out.

Each time you conduct a behavior, simple and simple as it may seem, affirm positively with phrases like"I have succeeded","I I can do it","I have tried and I have achieved my goal"...

6. Dedicate yourself time

Many people are more aware of others and of what is happening around them than of themselves. This behavior is a symptom of devaluation, these People do not appreciate themselves as they should.

Does this happen to you?

If your answer has been yes, from now on I recommend that you start to dedicate time to yourself. This time can be used for many Ways: doing some hobby, doing sport, taking care of your appearance, meditating...

The goal is to have time to do what you want, regardless of the activity.

7. Learn new things, get involved in new projects

Is there an activity you've always wanted to do and so far you have not dared? Come on, now is the time!

Performing a new activity has many benefits: you interact with new people, learn, have fun, enjoy...

All these benefits affect you in many ways: you get positive reinforcements, you are able to take new actions, you have control over What you initiate... thus diminishing the harmful effects of learned helplessness.

8. Change your language, the way you talk

Surely you are not aware of the amount of negative messages you say to yourself throughout the day:"I always do everything wrong","I am not able", "I do not know what I'm doing"...

From now on pay attention to what you say and how you tell it, in this way, you can be aware of those messages and change them.

Some possible alternatives are:"this is costing me, but I can do it","if I do not get it, nothing happens","nobody is perfect","what matters is Strive to the maximum"...

9. Generate alternatives

Before the situations of defenselessness learned generates different alternatives of action, do not stand still, defenseless.

For example, before a situation of abuse of power at work, find out about your labor rights and the possible lines of action you have and
Acts.

10. Generate expectations of your actions

You have just taken the path of change. Be patient and be realistic, as it may cost you more than you think.

Remember that the longer you are in the situation of defenselessness learned, the more expensive the process of changing those behaviors will be.

In a parallel way it generates expectations of where you can and would like to go, generates expectations of change that encourage you to continue working at Daily to change the learned helplessness that one day you acquired.

Finally, I can only remind you the phrase of the French writer Honoré de Balzac "Resignation is everyday suicide" And encourage you to start the change.

References

1. Baum, A. Singer, J. E. Singer, J.L. (2013). Advances in Environmental Psychology: Volume 2: Applications of Personal Control . Psychology
   Press.
2. Donald R. Sullivan, Xinggang Liu, Douglas S. Corwin, Avelino C. Verceles, Michael T. McCurdy, Drew A. Pate, Jennifer M. Davis, Giora Netzer. (2012). Learned Helplessness Among Families and Surrogate Decision-Makers of Patients Admitted to Medical, Surgical, and Trauma ICUs . Critical Care , 142 (6), 1440-1446.
3. Mikulincer, M. (1994). Human Learned Helplessness: A Coping Perspective . Springer Science & Business Media.
4. Nam, H. Clinton, S.M. Jackson, N.L. Kerman, I.A. (2014). Learned helplessness and social avoidance in the Wistar-Kyoto rat. Behavioral Neuroscience Journal , 8, 109.
5. Sarason, I.G. Pierce, G.R. Sarason, B. R. (2014). Cognitive Interference: Theories, Methods, and Findings. Routledge. Selignman, M. (2011). Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life . Knopf Doubleday Publishing Group.
6. Image source 2.