The family therapy Systemic Is based on the assumption that the family is a unique social system with its own structure and communication patterns.
These patterns are determined by several factors such as the beliefs and values of the spouses, the personality of each of the members of The family and the influences of the extended family (grandparents, uncles, cousins).
As a result of these variables, each family develops its own personality in a powerful way and that affects each one of the members.
Family therapy is also based on the following assumptions:
The symptomatology of a family member is, in fact, a symptom of an underlying family problem.
Only the symptomatology of the diseased member can be treated individually, however, this will solve the symptomatology but not the disease per se.
What happens frequently is that if it is only a member of the family and it ceases to present symptoms, after a time the Symptomatology appears in another member of the family.
So that you can understand it better, it is as if a plague of flying ants appears in your house. You can kill them all and even throw insecticide, but at Short time, they reappear again and again. You will end the plague when you find your nest and eliminate it.
In the case of family therapy, it is a question of finding the nest that generates the symptomatology.
A change in a family member, affects the family system and each member that compose it.
Family therapists always perform interventions taking into account the whole family. An intervention performed on a member, Is specifically programmed to affect the whole group in a particular way.
When to do Family Therapy?
That a family agrees to go to family therapy is a very important decision.
At first it is a difficult decision because they feel they should assume something is not going well, but after this first moment, it is about A decision through which the family sees a possible solution and this comforts them.
If the family has some or all of these symptoms, it may be time to consider professional help in family therapy:
Family members who have exaggerated emotional reactions such as excessive anger, depression, fear, etc.
These emotional reactions generate discomfort in the family system in the form of tensions and worry.
Members of the family who are retired or excluded from the family system.
There may be a family member or several who have departed from the family (or have been separated) and shut themselves up.
Symptoms of violence towards oneself or towards others.
These signs of violence are not isolated by punctual anger but are exaggerated and uncontrollable by other members.
Family members who express feelings of despair and hopelessness.
They are situations in which a member or several are unable to address a conflictive situation within the family system and, therefore, feel
That such problems have no solution and are unable to see the output.
Changes in a child's behavior at home or at school.
These behavioral changes are often associated with poor academic performance or the child begins to exhibit bad behavior in school, with Fights on the part of teachers or fights with their classmates.
It will be necessary to explore whether this behavioral change occurs only at home, at school, or both.
The family has had a traumatic experience and members are struggling to recover.
Traumatic experiences that may be involved in families are, for example, the Death of a loved one , A divorce or separation, or the discovery Of a infidelity By one of the spouses.
Family members with substance abuse problem.
He drugs abuse Or alcohol abuse is a problem that affects the family system and requires professional help.
Apart from those mentioned, there are other problems within the family that can be treated in family therapy such as: bad relationship between the couple, Poor relationships between siblings or between parents and children, communication difficulties, difficulties in establishing limits on the part of the parents, Other pathologies of some member not previously mentioned as schizophrenia , Bipolar disorder , Personality disorder, etc.
What is a family therapy for?
It helps you understand how your family system works in general and how you each function individually within the family.
It helps you not to focus on the member identified as"sick"but to focus more on the family as a whole.
It helps you identify conflicts and anxieties and develop strategies to solve them.
Strengthen all members of the family so that you can work on problems together.
To do this, all members of the family must take responsibility for the problems.
Family therapy is a very active therapy in which tasks are frequently assigned to members. For example, parents can be asked Which delegate responsibilities to the children.
The number of sessions varies depending on the severity of the problems presented by the family as well as the predisposition of the attendees to the therapy.
The therapist and the family agree on goals together and the time frame they are given to do it. Not all members attend each session. The therapist decides who goes to each of the sessions.
Myths of Family Therapy
Family therapy is a very long therapy; Medicating children or adolescents is faster
Family therapy is a type of Brief therapy Focused on goals, therefore, the goal is to restore balance and family well-being in the minor Time.
In fact, family therapy tends to be shorter than other types of therapy since engaging family members causes changes to occur. Produce on a larger scale and faster.
Family Therapists Blame Parents for Children's Problems
Family therapists need the collaboration of parents to make changes in the family, which makes parents Useful for achieving this mutual collaboration.
Family therapists provide the same opportunities for expression and communication to all family members and Understand and approach. Blaming parents would make the family go away and that is not the goal.
The important thing in a therapy process is for members to take responsibility, since only in this way can changes be generated to help improve the situation.
Family therapy implies that the whole family must be present in all sessions
That all the members who are living together are important and necessary in the first session. After a first meeting with the whole family in which Each member has been able to express their point of view on what happens, the therapist will decide who goes to the following sessions according to Consider more timely.
Some family therapists, such as Virginia Satir And Mara Selvini Palazzoli, they prefer to work with all the members of the family throughout the Therapy but it is not the usual.
The therapist can decide, for example, that only the couple of parents attend the second session, and only mention the siblings to the third session.
Or you can quote a single member and perform some individual sessions to treat anxiety issues, panic or depression .
Family therapy is not effective
Some people think that, from their own experience, therapy is ineffective.
After a time in therapy talking about their feelings in a consultation, they feel that it has not helped them in their depression or their panic attacks . Han Started to feel better after starting to take Antidepressants or Anxiolytics .
If therapy did not help me with my problems, why should therapy be better for my child than medication?
Family therapy has substantial differences in individual therapy. The family therapist works with the awareness that every human being is not Isolated from the environment but is part of a social group and a community.
Therefore, the behavior of a child is influenced by the people who are in their social circle; Especially his parents and siblings.
A child can start to get bad grades in school because his father arrives every day late from work. A child can start to fight continuously With other children because he hears his parents yelling and arguing, and fears that they will get a divorce.
A girl can lock herself up and not get along with her classmates because she worries that her older brother will argue so much with her mother. A girl Can start to wet the bed because she worries that her sister is going the wrong way.
Sometimes these types of problems are not detectable in the eyes of family members and appear to be unrelated. The role of the family therapist is See beyond the palpable and detect those invisible problems.
Making changes in the child's social context, family therapy can be very effective in solving emotional problems or Behavioral disorders of the child.
Example of a Family Therapy Case
Imagine for a moment a family of four: the father, the mother and two children of 16 and 10 years.
Parents are concerned that their 16-year-old son, Alex, is depressed. For a few months he has lost interest in things he used to like, he has stopped going out with his friends and he does not want to go to school.
Alex has always been a brilliant student, however, now he just approves. His friends are also worried about him as he had always been the joy of the garden. He spends many hours locked in his room without talking to anyone.
Her mother is very worried because she was always helping her, always talking to her, explaining everything and doing many things together. It had always been a great support for her and is now absent.
Parents attribute Alex's attitude to a problem of age. The stage of adolescence in which things get complicated. Worried about him, consider the option of Alex go to a psychologist to treat depression.
The parents accompany Alex on his first visit. The psychologist asks them to also go to see the 10-year-old daughter.
In this first session, the psychologist can observe how the family system is composed and structured. You can see the role each member plays and their relationship to each other.
The father is who sustains the family's economy. He works long hours with what is absent in family life. The mother is the one who takes care of the house and the children, however, often feels overwhelmed. The eldest son, Álex, helps his mother in everything she can so that she does not feel so overwhelmed.
Since the mother can not rely on her husband since she spends a lot of time away from home, she relies on Álex, both at home and at home.
emotional. The 10-year-old girl receives all the attention of her mother and older brother, overprotecting her.
Given this dynamics and family structure, we can see that Alex, having been 16 years old, has been given a role as"husband", in which he must support his mother emotionally and take care of the housework and care of his sister. This role has led to an inappropriate overload for his age for several years that has finally caused Alex to fall into an anxious depression.
Family therapy will aim to restructure the family system. Therefore, the necessary interventions will be made to achieve the following:
The father must recover the role of husband, and help his wife in whatever she needs by making her lean on him.
Alex, on the other hand, must abandon the role of husband to place himself in the role of adolescent son and thus get rid of all the burden that has gone Carrying over the years.
In the same way, Alex must relate to his sister from the position of brothers and not father-daughter to stop overprotecting.
The parents, must come and join to exercise as a team of parents as well as reestablish the union as a couple that had long been
Unchecked.
Alex, feeling that he does not have to take on the role of husband, frees himself from this burden and, therefore, the anxious depression disappears.