The main symptoms of Inferiority complex And their feelings are lack of self-esteem and a persistent feeling of not being up to the standards of others.
It is usually connected to a real or imagined defect in physical appearance, intelligence, education, social status, or economic status.
It can guide the people who suffer it to try to compensate it with difficult achievements or social isolation.
Although this complex has in some people the effect of activating them to get things, those achievements do not lead to feel better.
"While one person does not try because he feels inferior, another is busy making mistakes and improving little by little.-Henry C. Link.
Causes of complex and feelings of inferiority
Understanding its causes will help you overcome an inferiority complex. The apparent cause is usually that You believe That you are inferior to someone in a particular aspect: you are bald, you do not have money, you have little formation, you are white of skin, black of skin, these plump...
However, the real cause has nothing to do with it and if with the Perception and interpretation you make of reality And situations . With an inferiority complex you will say to yourself phrases like"you have no talent"or"they are better"; That is to say you will have an inner voice that suggests negative thoughts and that you are probably not aware of.
You may also experience some event in your past that leads you to think that you are inadequate or of little value. Some events could be:
- To play badly to a sport practiced by your companions.
- Be insulted by peers, teachers or parents.
- Be of a lower social class than your peers.
- Feeling less attractive than your friends.
They usually happen when there is something different about you that makes you feel inferior. The most important thing is that this only happens If you feel it as a disadvantage.
The true inferiority complex occurs when these two points are fulfilled:
- You must always be better than others.
- You think that you are worse than the others: a general feeling of inadequacy that is not based on reality.
Differences between knowing that you are inferior and feeling inferior
First of all I will try to differentiate two different concepts: to know that one is inferior to somebody in some aspect and to feel inferior.
Knowing you are inferior has no negative connotation and does not lead to discomfort. I may know that I am less attractive than Brad Pitt, that I have less money than Amancio Ortega or that I do not care as much as my neighbor, but that does not lead me to feel inferior and to have a negative feeling of inadequacy.
It would be crazy to pretend to be equal to or better than someone in every respect. We are all better in something, worse, inferior or superior and we simply have to accept it because it is part of the nature of the human being.
This does not mean that you do not try to improve. The important thing is that you do not feel bad and have a feeling of inadequacy and discomfort.
Treatment of the inferiority complex
Because the inferiority complex is created from your thoughts, you will have to overcome it from them.
1) Accept yourself physically and personally
It is likely that your feelings of inferiority are not related to your successes in a certain area of life or your social or economic status.
It is a feeling that comes from your interpretation of the world, your thoughts and although you try to change the outside with the maximum effort, you will not be helping.
Some people spend their life buying and collecting things and still suffer from complexes. Any effort to try to improve personally, achieve successes or goals, will be positive in your life although with them you will not fix an inferiority complex.
That is why it is necessary that you accept yourself as you are. From this try to improve, although always accepting your way of being and your characteristics and personal traits.
If you need extra motivation, I recommend these phrases .
2) If specific
There are millions of people in the world. Ask yourself what kind of people you feel inferior. Rich people? Attractive people? Smart people?
Now ask yourself exactly which particular people you feel inferior to. If that person is called Juan Domingo, ask yourself: Why do I feel inferior to him? What am I inferior to?
You have gone from being inferior to being inferior to a specific person. Now reflect on the aspects in which you are superior to that person. Is he as smart as you? Do you have your physical form? Is he as kind as you? Does your health?
The goal of this is not that you compare yourself to others, but realize that we are all different and that we are all better and worse at something.
3) Be aware of your critical voice
Your critical voice is responsible for the negative thoughts and phrases you say like:"I'm not accepted because I'm not attractive","I'm not intelligent".
Do not try to eliminate those thoughts because you will get the opposite effect (to appear more). Rather, accept them, question them and try to change them. For this, I recommend that you practice mindfulness and write down in a journal your frequent negative thoughts.
Also, the critical voice is responsible for negative labels that describe negative traits such as silly, bad, ugly, short...
You will also have to work to get rid of those labels, being aware of them and establishing new beliefs about yourself. Self-affirmations can work even if only in the short term and if they are in accordance with your beliefs, ie, it is important that you address the underlying causes of the inferiority complex.
4) Do not always accept the opinion of others
It is possible that the cause of your inferiority complex is in your past and therefore it is good that you reflect on it. It is possible that someone insulted or disrespected you when you were a child, adolescent or in the same adulthood.
Sometimes it is necessary to know which opinions to accept and which to accept. Some people have criteria and others do not.
Do you think it makes sense to believe that you are of little value because of someone's opinion? What authority does that person have? What's more, people who insult others or treat them without respect usually have complex and psychological problems.
It is not possible to determine the value of anyone based on someone's opinion, or even of a broad group. Some of the people who have contributed most to humanity like Gandhi, Mandela or the Dalai Lama, would never have insulted anyone or considered someone inferior.
5) Build Your Self-Esteem
Self-esteem and feelings of inferiority are incompatible.
Build positive self-esteem It will always help you to be happy and promote your well-being. For this I recommend that you read this article.