The self esteem Is a sense of satisfaction that comes from recognizing and appreciating our own value, Loving ourselves And growing personally. It is not a term that includes comparison or competition. With high self-esteem we learn to recognize and experience our own worth .
In this article I will discuss 10 habits for you to learn Boost your self-esteem , Whether you are a man, a woman, a child or a teenager. Even if you feel bad about yourself, there is a series
Of actions you can take to start changing your life.
It is essential for the Psychological well-being And therefore we must change certain habits and actions to recover and raise it.
Without it life can be very painful, not all needs are met and the full potential is not realized.
What is low self-esteem?
Low self-esteem is a negative concept of self. Answer the question How do I feel about myself?
The key to improving self-esteem is Change the way you interpret your life : Analyze the negative interpretations that you make of the facts and create new thoughts and objectives that promote the growth of your self-esteem.
Here are some of the benefits of having good self-esteem:
- You will have more emotional stability : When you have a good opinion of yourself you will not need the approval of others and you will not think constantly about what people think of you. In general, external events will not affect you so much.
- You will achieve greater achievements : Raising your self-esteem is more likely to go after hard-to-reach goals because you will believe that you have the ability to achieve them and therefore act with more motivation.
- You will be more attractive : People with a high self-esteem feel little needed and that is attractive. People who relate to you will feel a pleasant experience and you can also contribute more.
- You will be happy : One of the foundations of happiness is having a good self-esteem. You can fulfill all the conditions you are looking for but if you do not feel good about yourself, do not you will be happy .
- You will have better personal relationships : When you feel good about yourself, you will bring more value to others, you will be more pleasant and you will infect your well-being.
Those are some of the advantages of having a positive self-esteem. And how can you raise and strengthen it? Here are some of the habits you will have to work on to start building appreciation and appreciation for yourself.
Habits to have a healthy self-esteem
1-Destroy your critical voice
The primary responsible for low self-esteem is the inner voice with which we tell ourselves negative things .
Yes, everyone has a critical negative voice, although some people are more aware than others. It is the voice with which you say destructive thoughts to yourself, such as:
You'll never do it right.
You're worse than him / her.
He did not like that person.
For To have self-confidence , It is important not to accept those thoughts and replace them with more positive ones and to help you feel better.
To do this, try to attend to your thoughts and if you observe some negative, question it.
You can also create a word that pairs destructive thinking when you detect it: FOR!
In short, it is about being aware of your critical voice and not letting yourself be influenced by it, replacing those thoughts with more constructive ones.
This article Can help you be more positive.
2-Do not seek approval from others
Seek Approval Of others is something that, if we are not aware, we do constantly. Examples:
Put on clothes thinking about whether you like others.
Make important decisions based on the opinions of others.
Do not say our opinions because we think they do not please others.
So when you go do anything or make a decision , Ask yourself if you are thinking about what others will think, if you are acting to make them feel satisfied with your behavior.
One way to work this point is to show up against someone's opinion. Always assertive and educated.
Already Muhammad Ali said:
"It is the repetition of affirmations that guides belief. And once that belief becomes a deep conviction, things begin to happen."
Affirmations will help develop your self-esteem and you will simply have to repeat them a few times during the day. Example of self-affirmations?
"I liked myself and I totally accept myself.
"I do not seek the approval of others."
"I am a person of value and I have the right to be happy.
-I experience positive feelings constantly.
So that you do not forget this habit, you can write the sentences that serve you the most on a card and read them in the morning and at bedtime.
4-Do sport and take care of yourself physically
Yes, it is a fact that our physical appearance influences our self-esteem. With a good shape, you will look better and your self-esteem will rise.
If you're not used to exercising or going to the gym, start slowly with 10-15 minutes a day and see the time gradually increasing. You will see that it will become a positive habit with which you will enjoy; Remember that with sports you release endorphins (wellness hormones).
Social support is one of the most important shock absorbers of stress. The people around you serve as emotional support, to give you help, to have fun and to learn. That if they are people with criteria and positive. Negative people will probably lower your self-esteem.
6-Make a list of your achievements
This action is one that works best. Sometimes we think that we can not achieve something or that we do not have the capacity for it. For example:
"We can not pass an exam.
"We can not lose weight."
With a list that reminds you of your past achievements, you will remember that you have the ability to achieve what you set out to do. They do not have to be great achievements like winning a championship. An example would be:
-I have passed the career / vocational / preparatory course.
"I've learned to play tennis.
-I have learned to read English.
-I was selected to work in my current position.
Put your list in a visible place and read it often. That will make you make positive representations and enter a state that increases your self-esteem.
7-Make a list of your positive qualities
Be generous and sincere with yourself by making a list of your most remarkable positive qualities. If you do not know where to start, ask a trusted friend. They have to be at least 10 qualities. It is normal if you feel that it is difficult for you to do the list because most people focus on their negative traits and forget the positive ones. Example:
-I'm a worker.
"I have a good relationship with my family.
-I'm in shape.
-I am responsable.
8-Stop being a perfectionist
He Perfectionism Is one of the most destructive traits because we want to be something unattainable and although we improve constantly, we are never happy.
Also, wanting to do everything perfect will paralyze you when you see errors, you will leave everything for later and you will not get any kind of results. All this will lead to a decrease in your self-esteem.
How to stop being a perfectionist?
- Put limits to end things : Because sometimes we try to make everything perfect, in the end it is postponed and never ends. If you put a deadline, you will be forced to move on and finish things.
- Change your standards : Perfectionism comes from the way of thinking of"everything has to be perfect without any fault". However you can also think of another way that will also lead you to get good results like"I will strive at it and I will do my best. If I make a mistake it's normal and I can always learn from it."
9-Take care of your non-verbal language
Here I mean both your facial expressions and your body postures. Smiling and laughing will make you feel happier and show expansive postures (with open arms and not cramped) will make you feel with the highest self-esteem.
If you want to know more about non-verbal language, I recommend you this article .
Accepting yourself as you are is necessary to have a healthy self-esteem and be happy.
This does not mean that you can not change, be ambitious and improve your life.
It means accepting your faults, physical, abilities or skills, and from there work to improve.
In any type of situation where you feel bad about yourself, follow this process:
- Become aware of the situation : It is necessary that when you feel bad you become aware of it.
- Accept it : Accept the fact of feeling bad, is normal and you do not have to punish for it.
- Acts : What can you do to feel better?
If you do not like something, change it. If you can not change it, change your mind -Maya Angelou.
Once we accept our limits, we go through them -Albert Einstein.
11-Change expectations by gratitude
Having expectations can only lead you to be unhappy, to believe that you can not get what you want and to be continually dissatisfied with your results.
In addition, you will not live in the present, which is essential to be happy, to take advantage of your time and to realize your negative thoughts.
Instead of having expectations about the future or people, be grateful, feel grateful for your life, for what you have. That way you will enjoy much more of your life and of yourself.
What does science say about self-esteem?
I have done a search for research on self-esteem and these are some of the most important:
- According This studio , Accepting personal failures makes people more motivated to improve personally. Therefore, the Self-pity Makes you feel better about yourself and improves your motivation to grow personally.
- According This studio , People with more narcissism And lower self-esteem show greater activity in social networks and self-promotion more in them.
- According This studio , Students who experience cyberbullying, being victims or abusers, have lower self-esteem than those who have not lived the experience.
- According This studio , Self-pity provides greater emotional resilience and stability than self-esteem, assuming less self-evaluation, self-defense and self-improvement than self-esteem. While self-esteem involves evaluating oneself positively and may require feeling special and above average, self-pity does not entail either comparisons or self-evaluation. Self-pity treat yourself with kindness, recognize humanity and be aware when you consider the negative aspects of oneself.
- This investigation Found several interesting results. 1) Self-esteem increases from adolescence to the middle age, reaches its peak over 50 years, and then decreases until old age. 2) Self-esteem is a cause of the results you have in life, not an effect. 3) Self-esteem has an average effect on depression, a small-medium effect on relationships and job satisfaction, and a small effect on health. Together, the results suggest that self-esteem has a significant impact on real-life experiences and that low self-esteem is not an epiphenomenon of success and failure in important areas of life.
- This studio Suggests that low self-esteem acts as a risk factor for developing depressive symptoms in adulthood.
- You, like any other person in the universe, deserve your own love and affection-Gautama Buddha.
- The worst solitude is not being comfortable with yourself-Mark Twain.
- Giving people self-esteem is by far the most important thing I can do. Because then they will act -Jack Welch.
- Nothing builds as much self-esteem and self-concept as achievements-Thomas Carlyle.
- People who want more approval get less and people who need less approval get more-Wayne Dyer.
- Optimism is faith that guides achievement. Nothing can be achieved without hope and confidence -Helen Keller.
- Health is the greatest possession. Commitment the greatest treasure. Trust the best friend -Lao Tzu.
- To want to be someone else is to waste the person you are -Anonymous.
- Self-esteem is as important to our well-being as the legs for a table. It is essential for physical and mental health and for happiness-Louise Hart.
- Adversity and perseverance are things that can form you. They can give you priceless value and self-esteem -Scot Hamilton.
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