The feeling of loneliness, feeling lonely, presents itself as a feeling of isolation or helplessness that invades a person beyond if in reality this alone or not.
In this article I will explain how Overcome loneliness, Feel good about yourself and have a sense of happiness again.
Learning to face loneliness and coping is important, because spending time alone is something that most people experience at some point in their lives. There are different kinds of solitude and the sensations they provoke can also be diverse and of different intensities.
It is important to emphasize that it is not the same to be alone than to feel alone. Some people can be alone without having negative feelings towards it. Loneliness means being alone (or not) and feeling sad or depressed about it.
Some people feel alone due to separation or death of a loved one, lack of recreational activities that allow them to have greater social contact or for other reasons.
Tips for solitude management
1-Recognize your feelings and express them
The first step in coping with the feeling of loneliness is to recognize and accept this feeling.
For some people it may be difficult to admit, although it is necessary to express yourself to free yourself emotionally and there are several options to do so:
- You can simply write a diary about how you feel
- Write an imaginary letter to a friend
- Express yourself through a drawing or painting
- Writing a song or just telling you what happens to someone, can be a family member or a close friend.
Expressing your loneliness can help you discover other related feelings or the cause of them. And when you realize what the cause of your loneliness is, you can make the necessary changes to get out of it.
2-Avoid locking yourself up
When you have a strong sense of loneliness, it is best to seek social support, either from people you know or from new friendships .
He Fear of rejection Is often what can slow you down when starting new friendships or relationships.
You must put aside that fear, consider that there is nothing to lose and much that you can win away from the loneliness that makes you feel so bad.
3-Take a more active attitude
Loneliness is a passive state. That is, you will continue to feel alone or alone if you do nothing about it.
Many people wait for this feeling to magically disappear at some point, but without no Change your attitude , The loneliness will envelop them completely.
What's more, some people embrace loneliness and do not let it go. To incorporate the solitude like own thing and to submerge in the feelings that provokes takes to a Feeling of depression And impotence that only leads to an even more passive and depressed attitude.
So one of the first steps to follow is to have a more active attitude to combat loneliness. If you are missing a family member, call him or her, write or visit.
If you feel lonely for someone who has died, expressing the pain you feel for loss and remembering the happy moments you shared together, knowing that those memories will always accompany you, it can drive away feelings of loneliness.
4-Performs recreational activities
Join a dance class, singing or literary workshop, or any other activity you like. Join a travel club, a group of collectors or people who perform a sport that pleases you.
Performing a recreational activity has many benefits:
- First, take your mind away from feelings of loneliness
- You will be doing an activity that you enjoy.
- your Mood will improve
- Sport or physical activity Has other benefits : Controlling weight, reducing the risk of cardiovascular disease, strengthening bones and muscles, reducing the risk of some cancers...
- You will meet new people who share your same interests.
Doing something you like can make a lot of sense to your life, driving away the feeling of loneliness.
The Feelings of well-being May appear quickly in some cases, but in other people, feeling better takes longer. You only have to persevere .
5-Do not miss the meetings to which they invite you
Maybe at the beginning you have to force yourself to do it, but do not stop attending all the meetings you are invited to.
They are opportunities to live new experiences, meet new people and not feel alone.
You can also take the initiative and organize yourself or a meeting or an exit.
It is possible that the first few times you do not feel at all comfortable, but you have to persevere. Over time, you will see results.
You do not need to be the most popular since the first meeting, but it is important that you go to any type of social activity to build your new life.
Be curious, without expecting perfection or applause. Each time you meet people will be like a small social experiment or an adventure in which, if you are curious about others, you will receive attention in return.
To get out of solitude quickly, it is best to let curiosity drive you away from painful feelings and allow you to approach all kinds of people.
6-Being kind is an important key
Kindness can take you very far. No one is instinctively friendly to strangers or a little scary, although it is a choice you can make.
Be kind and generous in spirit with everyone, because it is a winning bet in the long run.
Being aggressive or stingy with people you do not know can form a negative reputation.
What you must do is the opposite: have A good attitude In front of the others, because in this way you will be able to win new friends and defeat the loneliness that seizes you.
7-Use social networks (moderately)
Certain studies Show that just using a computer, a mobile phone or a tablet to enter the Internet and contact other people in social networks or simply to look for information as entertainment, can help reduce the feeling of loneliness.
While this effect has been studied mainly in the elderly with a certain degree of education, the use of different social networks can help you feel less alone or alone, whatever your age.
Think that there are thousands of people who feel the same as you and expect to find someone to chat even if it is through the internet, to ward off negative feelings.
Of course, when meeting people through the internet you must take certain precautions and do not provide personal data or important information such as bank account or credit card data.
But being careful, when surfing online you can find support and understanding and even, you can establish lasting friendships.
In this article I better detail my opinion about the disadvantages and advantages of social networks.
8-Become a volunteer
Volunteer work can have the same effect as any other recreational activity. It also involves meeting with other people, being part of a group, living new experiences and also, it also benefits from altruism.
Volunteering can give new meaning to your life, it can bring new satisfactions and make you feel happy.
In addition, helping others and doing things for others activates the mind and heart, as well as being in company. Focusing on the feelings and needs of others will help you stop thinking about your loneliness and hopelessness.
9-Get a pet
Pets do not think, criticize and provide unconditional companionship, especially dogs and cats.
A study carried out at a nursing home in St Louis showed that residents felt less alone in spending time with a dog, compared to visiting a dog and other residents.
Imagine this situation. You have not had a good day, you're in a bad mood, about to unload with the first person that crosses your path. But when you get home, your dog barks and wags its tail, glad for your arrival, trying to catch your attention. Then you smile and do some pampering.
Your mood has changed and you do not feel so lonely anymore. And if you pick up a street dog, then you will be getting two benefits: altruism and companionship, two powerful factors to combat loneliness.
In addition, having a pet can also help you to meet other people: when you take the dog for a walk you can meet other people doing the same, for example.
10-Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
The investigations Demonstrate that loneliness and the Depression Can act synergistically and cause a deep feeling of discomfort.
It is like a vicious circle: you feel lonely, you become depressed, and then you feel lonelier and more depressed.
In addition, many people in this situation continue to feel alone despite being surrounded by people.
In these cases, simply performing activities and meeting other people is not enough and other measures, such as cognitive-behavioral psychological therapy, need to be taken.
This therapy is aimed at changing habits in the thoughts and attitudes of people who feel alone to reverse their situation.
The feeling of loneliness can be a momentary situation and can even give you a space for reflection and to know you better, but remember: it is you who must seek the way to ward off loneliness.
And if you can not fight it for yourself, seeking professional help is always a good idea.
And what do you do to combat loneliness? I am interested in your opinion. Thanks!