Worrying too much about what others will think or if they will accept you can be very limiting in your life:
- You do what others do even if you do not want to
- Do not you dare to do what you really want
So, Overcome fear of rejection Social is important if you want to have a good quality of life or reach your goals.
In addition, you will feel completely free, you will not be behaving considering the opinions of others.
In this article I will comment on a number of aspects to take into account To overcome that fear . If you turn them into habits you have become a free person.
How to lose the fear of rejection?
1-Change the meaning of rejection
Characters like J.K. Rowling or Walt Disney were also rejected many times.
However, they did not stop persevere And in the end they achieved their dreams.
What if you stop thinking of rejection as something bad?
Start thinking that if you are rejected, you are doing something for your life:
- You are getting closer to getting what you want
- You've done something different.
- You've tried to achieve what you want
What's more, use rejects as opportunities to learn and get better:
- If you are rejected in a job interview learn from mistakes
- If you are rejected, the person you like learns what you did wrong
- If you are rejected by a customer, learn how to serve better
2-Look for rejection
In Psychology habituation Is the psychological phenomenon by which the response decreases after showing numerous stimuli.
In this case the stimulus is to expose yourself to rejection and the response to feel bad or feel rejected.
The more they reject you, the less it will affect you.
You may have a greater tendency than other people to feel bad after being rejected.
Then you'll have to work harder.
On the other hand, at first it is possible that you feel a greater emotional erosion or erosion of energy, although it is something normal because you will be striving to change your tendency of behavior.
3-Do not look for approval
Stop seeking approval Of others for everything you do and your opinions.
Act without thinking whether they will approve you or not. In fact, the less you seek approval, the more you will be approved.
In any case, live in a way that only seeks to be accepted by yourself.
You can not have a good quality of life if you live to please others.
4-Be aware of what you think
If you think that you are rejected for some personal defect, Your self-esteem Will tend to descend (if that personal defect affects you).
However, most rejections are not based on something personal, rather they are by established social rules or ego defenses:
- If you do something that is outside the social rules, even if you do not skip any law, there will be many that will reject you
- If any person or group envies you, it will also tend to reject you.
He thinks rejection is not personal, but a behavioral tendency. Do not take it personally.
Leave the burden of rejection on others, not on you.
5-Look at rejection with humor
It does not matter in the situation that you are, you can always look with the spectacles of the humor.
This will make rejection not affect you at all.
If you talk to someone and they reject you, say something funny, laugh at your inability to socialize or the situation itself.
If you give a speech and they yell at you, laugh at your daring.
6-Build Your Self-Esteem
If you practice the above you will overcome the fear that you will be rejected little by little and in the end will not give you anything of fear.
However, there are rejections that are normal that they hurt; Those of the beloved ones.
In these cases, it is normal for you to feel bad, even if you have A high self-esteem It will not affect you so much.
If your self-esteem is healthy, you will feel the rejection of someone you love as a bump, but it will not affect your mood too much and you will move forward.
7-Think it's not the end of the world
When you feel afraid of being rejected, you tend to think that if you are rejected, it will be the end:
- What if they reject me?
- What if they do not like me?
- What if I do not like them?
In either case nothing happens. Life goes on.
The next time the fear of being rejected paralyzes you think: what is the worst that could happen?
8-Forget perfection and accept mistakes
It is possible that sometimes they may rightly reject you because you have done something wrong. In that case, you do not have to feel bad or have a bad opinion of yourself.
The reality is that sometimes you are going to be wrong, it is impossible to always do everything right or always be right.
When you get wrong or do something wrong, just accept it and learn from it for the next time. It is necessary To overcome perfectionism .
Is it possible not to be rejected?
The first reason to overcome the fear of rejection is that you are always going to reject someone, whatever you do.
If you do something, there will be people who will criticize you. If you do nothing, there will be others who will criticize you.
Regrettably There are toxic people That they are dedicated to criticize and reject without a real reason. They do it by their way of being.
Think of any famous person who has excelled in life:
- Presidents of the state are criticized by the opposition and by the population
- Top football players like Messi or Ronaldo are loved by many and hated by others
If you try something that is not socially established, you will be rejected
Think of scientists as Darwin, Einstein or Galileo.
They themselves and their theories were rejected when they proposed them, although later it was shown that they were true.
If you do not want to be a sheep, you will have to be willing to be rejected.
Otherwise, you'll have to settle for being part of the crowd.
In my opinion, being rejected is a good thing. As long as you do not disrespect or skip the laws.
If they reject you it means that you are acting.
The only way to not be criticized is to stay at home, without even a person in the world knowing you. Then you will not be criticized.
If you stand you will be criticized
If you stand out on something you will be criticized and you will have to get used to it.
When someone does something better than most or does better, is often criticized. The human being is a social being, tends to notice others and talk about others.
Think about these cases:
- The professional who is promoted and criticized by his peers
- The boy who wins and is rejected by his group of friends
And what do you do to overcome the fear of rejection?